Holistic Practitioning or What To do If Chemically/Radioactively Exposed

As my friends all know, I'm a psychic and a shaman/healer and a practitioner of all things holistic. As a shaman and a healer, I've been shown in visions many plants, herbs and minerals to use for well-being and treatment. When not dreaming (hahaha - riiiiiiight), whenever anyone has asked for my help in choosing proper natural, holistic treatments, I've been able to tap into the energy and almost immediately find what treatment will likely work best. As I'm researching, I'm also gathering all that data into my own data center (my brain), and since I have a photographic memory, I'm able to recall much of that information at a moment's notice.

So when I research, I don't just look at holistic websites - I also browse the CDC, manufacturers' material datasheets for chemicals, the Environmental Working Group, the Mayo Clinic, Johns Hopkins, pharmaceutical companies and on and on. I think it's vital to know the entire picture, and an illness can't be treated until one knows how it began.

I was just unfriended on FB by yet another person who is giving out erroneous information (I objected and poof! unfriended - certainly wasn't the first and certainly won't be the last). The subject was radiation or more specifically what to do when exposed? She's a big advocate of taking baking soda and salt baths daily and taking iodine supplements. These don't work, y'all.

From all my research (and yes, prodding by the universal energy), including going to the nuclear regulatory website, here's what I found DOES work:

1) Immediately after exposure to radiation OR chemicals, wash your body with baking soda and salt. If you wait too long, the baking soda and salt don't work. Baking soda is an acid neutralizer; it will neutralize the radiation or chemicals on your skin. I've read that some people also take baking soda internally (a tablespoon in a glass of water) to neutralize any harmful toxins that may have leached into their system. I'm sure it can't hurt, but if the chemicals have already been absorbed into your skin, they're in your bloodstream. You cannot neutralize anything already in your bloodstream - but you can help neutralize it if it's sitting in your digestive system, so maybe taking a couple of glasses of water and baking soda is at least a good idea. As to the salt, the salt acts to draw out the toxin. This is really helpful immediately after exposure. Again, if you wait too long, it's not as effective and in fact can dehydrate you by drawing out vital moisture. A daily bath of salts will leave you dehydrated. I've also read of ingesting earth (or clay) - don't do it, y'all. This particular "treatment" is worthless; dirt (clay) is best used externally (see below).

2) In the days following exposure take a bath with clay (kaolin, rhassoul, white clay, etc.) and activated charcoal powder. You can use some sea salt as a scrub, which will slough off the dead skin cells and allow the new skin to grow unencumbered. The clay and charcoal powder are the most powerful substances with which to draw out any lingering toxins from your skin. They'll help immensely in preventing or healing any lesions that may have formed on your skin. If your lesions are on a roll, make a paste out of the clay, charcoal powder, witch hazel (antiseptic), honey (anti-bacterial and forms a skin barrier preventing more toxins from entering), aloe vera (healing), tea tree oil (just a few drops - it's anti-bacterial and anti-fungal) and a few drops of lavender and/or chamomile (these will reduce the redness and aid in healing) essential oils. There are many other essential oils that aid in healing, but lavender is my go-to in all instances. If your skin is too dry, add some olive oil (or jojoba or coconut oil) to the mixture. Keep the paste on your skin until it either dries or for at least 30 minutes, then rinse off (don't wash it off with soap!).

3) If you think you're at high risk for radiation exposure, start taking pure kelp supplements or the actual plant itself. Be sure to read the label because not all kelp supplements are pure kelp - you don't want to add in any unnecessary ingredients (I've been taking Christopher's Original Formula Kelp for years). Kelp will keep your thyroid healthy so that if you are exposed, your thyroid can battle the radiation more effectively. Kelp is not a "cure" for radiation sickness; there is no cure for radiation poisoning - the KI tablets are to lessen the effects. If you're over 40, you cannot take the potassium iodide (KI) tablets. People over 40 are already at low risk for absorbing radiation because their thyroids have a natural ability to reject it, and taking KI can cause severe allergic reactions including death. So make sure your thyroid stays healthy before you get exposed, even with routine x-rays. And contrary to popular belief, taking iodine does nothing. It's not helpful - period.

4) Eat organic fruits and veggies (and sprouted beans and peas) and as little meat as possible. Meat has a tendency to sit in your gut longer than produce does, and the fat from meats can make a bad situation worse. The fruits and veggies will help your digestive system work properly so that your kidneys, liver and bowels are not overtaxed; add a little olive oil into your daily salad to get the needed fat or take some salmon or fish oil (not from the Gulf!) supplements for Omega 3 and 6 vitality.

Finally, as to all things holistic, never, ever believe anyone when they say they have a "cure." Holistic medicine is best (always!) used as a preventative so that you don't have to be "cured." Certain natural solutions are best used immediately after an incident. In the days that follow the incident, other solutions come into play. Still other solutions are best used so that you don't get an "incident" to begin with. So please don't accept anything as being a "cure" - our bodies often reject one solution over another. When asked for a treatment protocol, I always ask the person to give me feedback: did it help? did it work? If not, the problem may be too wide-spread at that point, so an alternative needs to be used. Often many disorders need immediate medical attention first, and then a holistic regimen can be employed afterwards. I'll also explain (ad infinitum) why a certain herb or plant may work better than another. For instance, sage is well-known for stopping excessive sweating, so since I'm a big-time sweating person (hot flashes!), I drink sage tea often (pour hot water over fresh sage leave and let steep for 3-5 minutes). But why does it help with excessive sweating? Sage is an anti-hyperintensive, along with being anti-diabetic, anti-inflammatory and anti-microbial. If you're hyper, you sweat; if you have high blood sugar, you sweat; if you have an inflammation or bacterial infection, you start sweating. Sage helps with all of these disorders, and a side benefit stops the heavy sweating (it does not prevent you from sweating - just excessively - since it's helping to heal as it works). If someone touts a "cure", ask why those certain ingredients taken together will help.

In this day and age of the underinsured or not at all insured, we often don't go to a doctor until our condition has severely worsened. Make sure you're healthy to begin with - nip those smaller incidents in the bud before they become full-blown crises. And if you do have to see a doctor? Gather all the information you can, particularly as to the medications he/she may prescribe, read up on the contraindications of the medications, and start researching holistic alternatives. Sometimes nothing will do except an initial antibiotic, but you can always start a preventative program afterwards that will ensure your healing is fast and (relatively) painless ♥

NOTE: Well, I told you I'd go on and on ad infinitum (don't say you weren't warned!), but another "cure" that is being highly talked about is using a coffee or some other "natural" enema to wash toxins out of your body. Y'all, enemas are totally unnecessary and may actually be just as harmful as the poison in your body. An enema (especially a coffee enema) can dehydrate you to the point that your digestive system can be overworked and then shut down. When your body is having to unnaturally expel waste, it's working overtime, and working overtime puts a strain (no pun intended!) on your entire system. You can't heal very effectively internally if each organ is being overworked. Unless you have liver or kidney disease, your liver and kidneys already do a wonderful job of elimination on their own. Make sure that they keep functioning well by eating healthy foods!  

Casey/Caylee Anthony AND Cleaning House

Casey & Caylee Anthony

The day after Caylee Anthony was reported missing by her grandmother, I had a vision, one of which I'll never, ever forget. Keep in mind that when I dream of myself, I'm actually substituting for the victim/perpetrator: I was shopping. Actually on a shopping spree and delighted to be buying multiple little trinkets for The Girls (my dogs). I was in a full state of bliss and overjoyed to have money in which to splurge. As I was standing at the checkout counter, paying for my purchases, I suddenly remembered that I had left my (human) toddler in a car seat in the car and had spent over an hour in the store. I panicked, rushed outside where it was hot and humid, opened the car door, and my baby was dead, sweat rolling down her face, her hair stuck to her head, her precious, lovely little face stark white with red blotches. Too overcome with grief (I was sobbing and screaming in real life as I was seeing this vision), I made myself change the ending - kinda like rewind! - to one where I found the toddler alive, but with the physical description the same, and she looked at my stricken face and said, "It's okay, Mommy. I know you didn't mean to do it." A few days later Caylee showed me where her little body was buried - again in a vision, seemingly out of the blue. It was a shallow water area, and it reminded me of the little inlets that abound on Lake Martin/Lake Jordan in Alabama - secluded, marshy, filled with plant matter. When I awoke, I looked on a map of Orlando to see if I could pinpoint the spot, but if you've ever seen a Google Earth picture of Orlando, you notice that there are hundreds of such spots all over.

So fast forward to the trial this week of Casey Anthony for the murder of her daughter Caylee. Casey claims that the baby died accidentally in a pool drowning, and somehow her father was instrumental in paying off a meter reader to bury Caylee's body. We know for a fact that Caylee had duct tape on her mouth before she died. We know she was buried in a water-filled area of some woods near Casey's home and had plant matter growing through the plastic bag(s) that covered her body. We know for a fact that Casey's mother, Cindy, thought Casey was a negligent and horrible mother and was trying to adopt Caylee before Casey took Caylee and left her home. We know Cindy Anthony also had a violent confrontation with Casey right before Casey took Caylee and left. We found out months later that Casey went on a shopping spree the day her daughter supposedly died, and the money she used on that spree was stolen from her grandmother's bank account.

So what really happened? I honestly think Casey left Caylee in her car, with duct tape over her mouth to prevent her from crying out loud, went shopping, completely forgot about her daughter, and by the time she returned, Caylee was dead. I also think Casey was overwhelmed with grief at the discovery of her daughter. So why all the lies and coverups? Casey was terrified of her mother Cindy; if Cindy ever found out that Casey has negligently killed Caylee, Casey just "knew" Cindy would have her tried for murder and, most importantly of all, never forgive her nor love her again. So Casey did what she does best: she lied, lied and lied some more and tried to bury her daughter in a place close to home but covered up, nonetheless. And now Casey's dragging her father through the mud, laying the blame on him, because she cannot bear to accept the responsibility for her own actions.

Does the above make Casey a murderer? No (although it's definitely her fault). Does it make her a negligent mother? Yes. And she's still a liar above all else, constantly deflecting her own guilt onto others. But what I gained from the first vision was that Casey did suffer overwhelming grief, albeit not long enough to satisfy those who want an outwardly sign of justice for Caylee. So y'all, once again there's a moral to this story: even if someone is reprehensible in his or her actions, those actions transfer into karma, and Casey is affected and will continue to be affected by her actions. What goes around comes right back around to smack you in the face; so at the same time you're demanding justice for Caylee, remember that Caylee has forgiven her mother, but Casey will never be able to forgive herself - perhaps the harshest judgment and punishment of all.

CLEANING HOUSE

My next door neighbor has issues about mowing his yard - he doesn't do it. It drives me literally nuts! OH! Um, so actually this makes me the one with the issues - it doesn't bother him hahaha! This neighborhood, although distinctly middle-class, is so close to D.C. and so desirable that even the small homes are sold for hundred of thousands of dollars and often renovated by new owners into larger, newer mini-mansions. Our own home is small, not renovated (although the kitchen has been remodeled!), and our next door neighbor's home seems to be falling apart, exclusive of the unkempt yard. Our neighbor even has to walk his dog several times a day although he has a fence surrounding the entire property - apparently he's too apprehensive to let his dog out in all that chaos.

There's about a three-foot section of (unmown!) grass that adjoins his frontyard fence and the street. There's also an open (unmown!) area of grass next to his driveway, joining our property. So instead of continuously bitching about his neglect, I now mow both of his grass patches - the one next to mine by his driveway and the strip along the street - once a week while I mow my own yard.

I've never told him it's me that's mowing his patches of grass; perhaps he thinks that the grass fairies are doing it :D. But it keeps me peaceful and calm, and it keeps my immediate area uncluttered and chaos-free. Why is this important? When your yard or your house or your work area is filled with chaos, so goes your life. Negative energy is attracted to chaos. Always! My own home is cluttered but not overwhelmed. I no longer hoard those things that seemed so important just a few years ago. My husband has a tendency to cling, but I surreptitiously recycle or give to charity those objects of his hoarding (magazines, books, papers, socks, jeans, etc.) behind his back. He's never questioned my actions nor has he asked where those items are; the peace of a chaos-free environment soothes his soul.

If you think your life is out of control, or you're suffering negativity at work or home or in your feelings or, well, anywhere, take a look at your environment. Start cleaning! Get rid of all the extraneous things in your life, whether they're material possessions or overgrown yards or people. Don't let someone else's chaos invade your peace. Start cleaning!

The Otherworld, or Where Do We Go When We Die?

What happens when we die? Where do we go, specifically? Is there a Heaven and a Hell?

Death to us in this life is a finality. We've come to believe that it is an ending to one's glorious time spent here on Earth. We grieve for those who have died and are out of our lives, and often we can't be consoled by the many words our friends use, such as "She's in a better place" or "It was meant to be" or "It's God's plan."

I've been shown the Otherworld many times, both in visions while awake and in dreams while asleep. I've spoken to those in that otherworld, and I've watched them go through their transition phase. Death is not what many believe it to be.

When we die in our human bodies, our soul is released. It goes to another dimension or parallel world - I honestly don't know which it is, and it hasn't been explained to me in terms that I can comprehend. I call it the "Otherworld" because, well, it IS a world different from our own. Right after death, we might be confused or bewildered or not even realize we've actually died. Friends and/or relatives that we knew in this life appear to us, often within three days before we die if we have a terminal illness, and bring us immediate comfort; we realize at that moment of death that we are, indeed, still "alive" although not physically.

Every soul in the Otherworld first reflects on his or her human life. And by reflection, I mean he or she re-lives every moment, good and bad, and feels all the pain, sorrow, joy, humor, etc. of every single living thing we've come into contact with over our lifetime. We realize during that reflective period how our actions affected every person, plant, animal, mineral and the consequences that followed. In other words, we learn.  "Karma" means action, and our actions here on Earth all have consequences; hopefully we learn about those actions while still in human form, but if not, they're immediately clear to us during our reflective time in the Otherworld.

Even the people we consider truly evil go to the same Otherworld as the truly righteous go. Do the evil ones suffer? Not physically, but soul-wise, yes. Since all is known during the reflective phase, all is felt as well. Since all worlds and all beings are connected to each other (the "Universal One"), the reflective phase is a time of reconnecting to all - to the One - which is all the more poignant if the soul was less than kind while in human form. I realize that we all want to see a horrible person suffer, as he or she made us suffer while they were alive, and by thinking of Hell as a physical place of fire and brimstone, it satisfies our notion of revenge. But by knowingly being connected to All while in the Otherworld, that evil person truly feels and understands what he or she unleashed during their human time. Self-punishment, even in this world, is absolutely the most brutal form of punishment there is, which is why negative actions reap horrific consequences to the evil-doer, even if we aren't there to witness that person's realization. And after a soul goes through the reflection period, he/she has no need for revenge. Revenge is not even an afterthought, because the soul knows that his/her transgressions were just as harmful, even though it may not have been to an evil extreme. A childhood saying I remember illustrates this: "'Tis a sin to steal a pin, much less a larger thing. For when you die, God will say "Where is that pin you stole away?" When you say, "I do not know," He will say, go down below." So every wrong you've committed during your lifetime (and I know I've committed many) is equal to the acts of a Hitler or Stalin because Everything Just Is - neither good nor bad but equal in the energy picked up by the Universal All. Remember, the only person judging you is yourself, and you're your harshest judge.

So this brings me to the next point about the Otherworld: what we consider evil and righteousness in human life is not considered that way in the next because Everything Just Is. Souls in the Otherworld are able to interact with humans at all times; some of us are aware of the interaction, most of us are not. What many people consider divine intervention or angelic blessings are actually neither - those actions are actually connections with the One, and it's because of the One within yourself that you're able to receive an intervention. I know this is hard to grasp, but each of us, through our connection to the One, has the power to act in a way that we consider divine (or miraculous). As a shaman and healer, I'm a conduit to the Otherworld. I cannot heal another human without that human helping me. When I start the healing process by giving thanks to all the spirits of people, animals, plants and minerals, I'm sending out a vibration to connect with the One. I then connect with the sick person, who connects with me, and we both become the One. Get it? But the healing is not actually by God or an Angel or whatever many may think it is - the healing has come from within, from that person's connection to me and to the Universal One's energy.

Are all souls then human souls with no Angels whatsoever? Well, yes and no. Some are human and some are sentient beings such as animals we've come into contact with during our lifetime. Some souls haven't been human in eons, and some have only had one incarnation as a human (I'll get to that in a minute). So we think of those ethereal beings as Angels when in reality they're ascended souls or haven't been reincarnated yet. When you have an angelic encounter, chances are that you know that soul - you just don't recognize him/her in his/her ethereal form. There are also those souls who have never been human and have lived in the Otherworld (and if there are many dimensions, then there are many other entities) exclusively; they are neither angelic nor demonic but rather entities unto themselves that we, as humans, can't even begin to comprehend.

So when I say that in the Otherworld Everything Just Is, I mean it literally. When a spirit is watching you from there (and actually "from there" is right here - we just can't see it) and sees all the anguish you may be experiencing, the spirit doesn't make any form of judgment such as horror or pity or outrage. The anguish is yours to learn as part of your journey and time here in this world, just as utter joy is yours alone to experience. The spirit may let you know that he/she (and all spirits are gender-neutral, but I'll use pronouns) is aware of your situation, but he/she knows that whatever you're going through at the moment is an experience to remember and learn from, and that you must move on to the next experience. Everything Just Is, not good, not bad, just is - as a learning tool. For instance, a loved one died unexpectedly, maybe even was murdered, and you're inconsolable and wonder why this happened; not to mention you want instant revenge on whoever did this. From the Otherworld's point of view, you just learned that you are not only able to love someone other than yourself, but that you felt that loved one's pain to the point that you realized that all life is precious. Hopefully you'll also learn that killing is never an option, that pity and compassion should be given to the murderer since the murderer is also part of the One - which means you are part of the murderer, too.

Many lessons are to be learned from each of life's incidents. Do we learn them all during this lifetime? Sadly no. So after we die and we finish our period of reflection, we are then given the choice of reincarnation to try to learn love, compassion, respect, empathy and our connection to every living thing as a human. Those who embraced and thrived on all of that while in this world (before death) go on to live in the Otherworld without reincarnating (they "ascend"). We don't know how they live after ascension; again, it's not knowledge for us to know. Maybe they live in a utopia of bliss; I used to think, "How boring!" but in that Otherworld, souls don't think the same way as we do here on Earth. I like to compare it to junior high: all that crap that happened to us in junior high becomes less and less important as we age, right? Same thing in the Otherworld: things/events/feelings of importance in this world become non-existent as we mature, or ascend, in the Otherworld; Everything Just Is.

So is there a God? Of all things for me to come to terms with, this was the hardest by far. I would love for there to be a wise, compassionate God! The Universe and all within it is creatively designed, so perhaps there is, indeed, a single Creator. However, if so, the Creator is part of the Universal One and thus we are each the Creator, just as we are each the One. This means that there isn't a hierarchy per se; God isn't going to save you, because you already have that power within yourself. My biggest dream for humanity is to come to the realization that we can change our world instead of waiting for a savior - whether divine or not - to rescue us. We can all connect to the One because we are all One. Jesus, the Buddha, and others all taught this concept in its purest form before organized religion, with all its human foibles, perverted the teachings to accommodate the hopes and fears of followers. But it really is that simple, y'all, and you don't need a Bible or a Koran or a Torah or anything else to know the way to enlightenment (or heaven, if religion is your thing): we are all One, thus if you have compassion, respect, love, and empathy for every single animal, person, plant and mineral, there's no need for war or fear or jealousy or any of the many other negative feelings and actions most people live with day in and day out.

More thoughts on the Universal One: If you've ever experienced a coincidence in your life (and who hasn't?), you're actually experiencing synchronicity. There are no coincidences; everything is connected, so everything happens naturally and as it should be. A chance meeting or a phone call from a friend about whom you were just thinking? No "chance" to it; since we're all connected, mergers happen naturally and frequently. And the One pertains to ALL things. For instance, I like to mentally zoom into a tree and have the branches and leaves wave in the rhythm to which I'm swaying at that moment. I start at the roots, zoom through the sap, flow through the branches and start swaying. The tree follows after just an instant. Some people might think that it's me that's making the tree sway, but it isn't - it's my connection to the tree that causes us to sway. I'm now part of the tree, and the tree is now part of me. We are One. When you realize every single thing is One, the energy flow that you can impart and receive is phenomenal. You don't want to hurt yourself or allow any one else to harm you, so when you realize we are all One, you don't want to allow any harm to occur to any other thing. "Walk a mile in his shoes" or "Do unto others as you would want them to do unto you" takes on a whole new meaning when you're fully aware of being One. Spread the love, y'all, so that when one rejoices, we all rejoice!

Yet another earthquake and a recurring Vision

On March 29 I felt another earthquake tremor. This one was very gentle, almost like a rolling sea as opposed to a shaking tree, and I spoke about this on Facebook. Today Japan suffered a 7.4 quake. A tsunami warning was issued, then called off, thank goodness!

For the last week, I've awakened each morning to this thought: "The video is a LIE!" While most of the vision is obscured, I distinctly saw thousands of people raptly watching a television monitor and being alarmed by what a government official was telling them. So whatever's coming down the road, whatever the government is going to throw at us - and by government, I don't know if it's an official proclamation or by the Republican leadership or whomever - whatever "facts" may be shown as "proof", it's not true. I'm certain I'll know what this vision is about when the event occurs, so stay tuned y'all!

UPDATE: On May 1 Osama bin Laden was killed by the U.S. A special news report was aired, and in it the U.S. government claimed that OBL was armed and engaged in a firefight and was subsequently killed. I'm pretty certain that the entire nation was watching the report with shock. As the days passed, the firefight portion was amended to he was armed. Finally, the truth came out that he was unarmed. Makes me wonder what else the government lied about re this mission.

Earthquake Part II

Right before I got up this morning I felt the now-too-familiar earthquake shaking but it was more gentle. And as soon as the shaking stopped, a blast of warm air blew across my face. I would swear that my hair was blowing in real time as it was happening. At that moment I thought I was going through a blast wave. Explosion?

Earthquake!

On Tuesday at about 7:30 p.m. I was sitting on the couch, and I felt an earthquake. I felt it start at my feet and work its way up until my entire body was shaking and rolling with the waves. The couch remained stationary, as did everything else in the house. Jeff had been outside, and when he came back in I asked him if he had felt it, too. He hadn't, but told me I was probably having a vision (he's lived with me long enough to know that the unexplainable will soon be explained).

I immediately got up, went to the computer and accessed the usgs.gov website to see if any quakes were happening - first in this area, then New Madrid/Arkansas and finally California. There was no activity anywhere except California, which was having dozens of tiny tremors. I posted to Facebook what I had felt and my research results, when one of my friends told me that a 7.2 quake had just hit Japan. I laughed and wrote: "on the usgs site it wants you to report if you felt it. Um, I can just imagine what they'd think if I said, "Yeah, I felt it - in Falls Church, VA" hahahaha."


So fast forward to tonight and Japan just had an 8.8 quake complete with dire tsunami warnings for much of the world. Was my precog telling us that we're entering an active seismic period to be filled with mega-quakes in the days (weeks) to come? Or will this be the end of it? Personally, if I lived in any of the quake-prone areas, I'd have my emergency provisions up-to-date and an emergency plan finalized just in case. Because it just might be the beginning...


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On a separate note I received the following e-mail on Wednesday:

"Hi Kerry,

I just published an article on my blog entitled “Top 30 Ghost Blogs at http://www.forensicsciencetechnician.net/top-30-ghost-blogs/  . Anyway, I am happy to let you know that your site has been included on that list."

I replied with, "wow, I'm really flattered - thank you! I didn't think anyone even read my blog hahahaha!

Hope you have a wonderful week, as well, and again, thank you!"

So, woo hoo for me!!!! I looked at the other ghost blogs listed, and they're really interesting if anyone reading this wants to delve more into the paranormal :D 

A Vision of Things to Come

I was just asked by a friend if I think a revolution is coming to America. In light of the Egyptian protests and unrest here at home, it's certainly a reasonable feeling that a change is going to come, but here's my reply to her:
"
Yes, but I'm shocked by how many people either don't care or think all of this turmoil is caused by us liberals or caused by God or is a biblical prophecy, and would therefore rather hide in their bunkers and stock up on arms instead of act...ually taking action (like us liberals are doing)! They're blaming everyone but themselves for things that we CAN change, if only we try. So if you really want to know what I dream about when I foresee the future, it's that the world is dark and on fire and is toxic and we're facing an ice age of mammoth proportions if we don't change. This is why I'm so adamant about change and so feverish in my attempts to stop the holy rollers from doing yet further damage to the issues at hand; the buck stops with us - not God, not the government, US."

As anyone who is in contact with me knows, I am an outspoken activist and liberal thinker. I'm also Buddhist, and we abhor violence as much as we love "love." But for the past month or so I've been having many, many visions of our future world. Dark red skies, fire and smoke, polluted streams and oceans, sickness and illness, misery all-encompassing. The visions are so horrific that in the last three weeks, I have broken three teeth with the sheer pressure of my jaw. I've awakened three times to find my jaw clenched so tightly that I had to force myself to unlock it. When I could finally open my mouth, tooth particles fell out (and indeed I'm typing right now with a throbbing jaw from an abscess that formed in one of those teeth. Yeah, gotta call the dentist!).

So why do I still have so much hope for the future? Because I KNOW it can be changed. No future is set - it changes constantly by those of us who have the will and insight to change it. Change must begin at home, followed with one's community, the nation and the world. We don't have to set ourselves on fire, y'all! We don't have to accept as normal that GMO seeds will take over the fields. We don't have to accept that the military/industrial complex will continue to reap billions of our own money in order to wage illegal, fruitless wars abroad that only cause more hate and death to follow in their wake. We don't have to accept drilling and spilling more oil, gas, and coal dust into our precious waters. We don't have to accept a non-green future! We don't have to accept illness and misery as a normal fact of life. We don't have to accept billions of people starving from corporate malfeasance or from government neglect. We don't have to accept animal torture or environmental rape or man's inhumanity to man. WE CAN CHANGE.

Please! I'm begging, y'all! Please be the change that you want for our future! Please let my visions of utter destruction become a myth! If you have to write and call your government representatives every single day on important issues, DO IT. If you have to protest by marching or organizing a sit-in and shut-down of any corporation that is neglecting its responsibilities to our planet and to its citizens - human and non-human - DO IT. If it means that you have to pay a few dollars more for non-GMO seed to plant your gardens, DO IT. If it means that you can't get that product that you absolutely need because it was made in China, DO IT. Finally, if it means that you'll be placed on some type of Homeland Security anti-terrorist watch list, DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!

NO MORE FEAR. No more remaining silent. Or there will simply be NO. MORE. PERIOD.

Joy and Sorrow

For the last several days I've been seeing bright flashes of light.  While I felt warmed and comforted by these sightings, I couldn't complete discount that either my vision was getting a little wonky or I might be having mini-strokes (I'm still trying to find rational explanations for what I can't explain).  I didn't mention it to Jeff, as I couldn't explain what seeing "flashes of light" truly meant to me.  Then two days ago, I clearly heard the song "Conversation with Death (Oh Death, Oh Death)" which is an old bluegrass dirge in which a man tries to bargain with Death to spare him - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qpkdOA1LU5I.  I was a little surprised, to say the least, and was hoping it didn't pertain to anyone I knew; since I often have trouble understanding what's being shown to me until the event actually happens, I kept it in the back of my mind.

Last night Jeff and I were talking about our future - he begins working with a new company in two weeks -  and he said, "I feel really, really good about this new company.  I think I finally feel positive that everything will be okay.  I've been seeing bright light flashes the last few days, and I just know it's a positive sign that everything's going to be okay for us!  What's your intuition telling you?  Do you think we'll be okay?"  I just stared at him, opened mouth, and finally stuttered, "You've been seeing the lights, too?"  He said, "Yes - you, too???"  And I went on to tell him about my own sightings and how comforted I was by them, that they emitted a truly loving, positive energy.  Then I told him, "But I clearly heard "Conversation with Death" the other day, but I'm positive it's not about us - at least I hope it isn't!"  He laughed and told me it was in all likelihood a message for someone else for me to remember when the event happened.

So today we all learned that Rep. Gabrielle Giffords and Federal Judge John Roll and many others were shot in Tucson, AZ.  Was the dirge "Conversation with Death" meant for them?  Was it meant for the little 9 year old who was also shot, then died?  The hatred and violence that is escalating in America today is abhorrent; I just wonder why taking another's life is ever considered an option.  I wonder why many conservative pundits keep using phrases like "we need to set our targets on X" or "we need to beat the hell out of that legislation" or "someone should shoot him and make him shut up."  I know that all that awful energy is circulating everywhere and picked up by all; most try to project their own love and peace and actively engage to make the world a better place in order to counteract this vileness, but there are always the few who pick up that energy and can't let it go - often to the point of being violent.  Does life mean so little that it must die for not only the victim but for the murderer as well?

At this point I'm still excited for Jeff (and I) and his new company and still feel really positive.  However, I'm having my own Conversation with Death tonight in the hope that before I die I can truly make a difference in this brutal, ugly, greedy world that's now apparently become the norm.  I'm asking Death for a reprieve and hoping many, many others will do the same.

Peace, love, compassion and respect, y'all

Heartwarming/Life Affirming; Heartbreaking/Life of Regret

I'll start first with the heartwarming and life-affirming story:

Every year at Christmas I get Jeff and me and The Girls scratch-off tickets for our stockings.  When my chocolate lab Lucy was alive (see www.gertieseesghosts.com/tributetolucy.html), she was the one who always won the big ticket payout on the scratchoffs - usually $50 every year!  And a more humble winner would be hard pressed to be found, as she always smiled sheepishly when told she had won (again!), her tail wagging in joy and excitement.  Now it's 6 years later, and the tradition continues with the placing of the scratchoffs in our stockings, although this year Jeff decided he'd get us each one, too (double the fun!).

I have said many times that our yorkie Sadie is Lucy reincarnated; she has the same temperament, watches me constantly, knows no enemies, likes to eat cat litter (don't worry, I'm not going to discuss that!) and even eats the same way that Lucy did.  This year at Christmas reaffirmed to me that Sadie and Lucy are one and the same: Sadie won $50 on her scratchoff ticket!  Jeff and I just looked at each other and said simultaneously: "Lucy!"  And in the interest of full disclosure, we ALL won - out of 10 tickets purchased, 7 were winners, but Sadie had the only big bucks win :D.

 Now for the heartbreaking, which I debated blogging about but which I finally concluded should be known because it speaks to living and dying:

My stepfather Jamison died in March 2010 (see my blog post in March re that event), and other than his awful thoughts prior to his death being picked up by me, I haven't thought of him since that time; he wasn't in my life for over 30 years, so his death didn't leave any mark on me except sadness for him (certainly not for me).  Imagine my surprise, then, when a few weeks ago after we had hung the stockings on the mantel and had finished putting the Christmas lights up, I was walking from the office through the livingroom to the kitchen when I saw Jamison sitting on my couch.  He was sitting with his legs apart, hands clasped in front of him and looking straight at the stockings in a thoughtful, somber, regret-filled face.  It truly broke my heart.  He never looked at me so I was able to observe him for a few seconds before he vanished, and the pain and regret and sorrow was palpable.  But he was also reflecting, which I believe we all do when we die and which we should do as we live.  Karma is indeed a bitch, but I believe it goes further than that: death is not final - ever.  We go on to live either in the otherworld, or we're reincarnated to try to learn those lessons we missed or to try to experience life on another level than we did on the last go around.  I'm actually thankful to have gotten a glimpse of Jamison in reflection; it's a reminder that even those in this life who may seem to lack compassion, love and respect reflect upon their choices when they're in that otherworld and hopefully will gain new understanding into how mistaken they were when alive in this world.   Therefore, as the Buddhist tenet insists, we must learn in this world to love those who are less than lovable because one day they WILL see the consequences of their actions.

Autism and the Paranormal

I took the Autism Quotient test yesterday (http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/9.12/aqtest.html) and scored a whopping 37 points.  While disheartening, I always suspected I had some degree of autism.  My mother used to tell me that when I was a toddler, I constantly beat my head against the wall and rocked myself to sleep - both of which can be early signs of autism.  I was obviously different temperamentally than my siblings; my mind was focused inward, often to the exclusion of my family.  Long road trips were nirvana for me because my parents thought I was the perfect child (I didn't get cranky and didn't need to be entertained - my mind entertained me) and were too busy dealing with my siblings to pay attention to me.  Heaven!  Years later when I was in my mid-20's, I took a pottery class when I lived in Birmingham.  My instructor was a doctor's wife who had a three year old daughter who had almost been scalded alive in the bathtub by a baby sitter and who subsequently exhibited all the signs of autism.  This was in 1978 when little was understood about the disorder and wasn't even generally discussed, and even though the instructor was married to a physician, they were at a loss as to how to treat their daughter.  After class one day I told my instructor that I, too, acted similarly as a child but that obviously I had grown "out" of it or at least was able to function "normally."  We spoke at great length about her daughter's behavior and about my behavior during childhood; I don't remember the details except that by the time we finished, she was so relieved that she cried, hugged me, and told me that I had been the first person to give her hope as to her daughter's future.

So what does all this have to do with the paranormal?  I'm already branded a freak by many because of my ability to connect to the other dimensions; do I really want to add another label, especially an additional one of such mystery that most people can't even begin to understand what goes on in a mind that shuts off the rest of the world?

I think the whole point of this blog is to get people thinking about what it means to be different.  Different doesn't mean ignorance or unawareness of how others may perceive the world; different in my case means that I don't understand how "normal" people can think the way that they do :D.  Why are they so slow in seeing the connections?  Why can't they do hours of research that I find fascinating and they find pure drudgery to seek out some semblance of truth?  Why can't they see spirits among each other?  Why is it so hard for them to listen to their intuition?  And why is it so easy for most people to reject outright what I so clearly see both in my mind and physically?

Psychic ability goes way back in my family; in the first remembered incident my greatgrandfather and his brother, both Irish immigrants, were working together one day when they both turned to each other and said, "Our mother is dead."  Their mother was in Ireland; they were in the U.S., and they were correct.  Subsequent generations either ignored their gift or were too embarrassed to admit it; alcoholism is alive and well in the Murphy genes, and sometimes I wonder if maybe they all drank to avoid "seeing."  Then I came along and loudly shouted that I was psychic (I'm sure there were quite a few giggles of disbelief, but it certainly didn't stop me from talking about it - is that a symptom of autism or sheer stubborness?).  It turns out that slowly several of my relatives have contacted me saying that they, too, have a gift.  And I noticed an interesting commonality between us: we're mostly shy, mostly bookworms, and mostly introverted.  I'm clueless as to how they would score on the AQ test, but I feel that they might have a higher than normal test score.

So this begs the question: are we (my relatives and I) more aware of the other dimensions because we're to some degree autistic or did being born with the gift of sensitivity cause us to be autistic?

I was born in 1954 way before vaccines were the norm, and my mother made sure we ate lots of fruits and veggies as opposed to high-carb low nutritional value food (we didn't even have bread at dinner - too "fattening" was my mother's moto), so it wasn't diet or vaccinations.  All I know is that I've always felt acutely uncomfortable in unfamiliar situations, around other people who I don't know, and shy to the point of debilitation.  There was a running joke among my mother, older sister and me about our "phone phobia" in that we all three were/are seized with paralysis when forced to speak on the phone.  The shyness factor I've overcome by forcing myself to make the first introduction and paste a smile on my face, thus allowing others to not feel threatened when they're around me.  I couldn't stand to be touched/hugged/kissed on the cheek until I again forced myself to make hugging a big priority, and now it's not uncommon for me to hug strangers in the grocery store hahaha.  But the issue goes way beyond shyness or awkwardness; it's the fact that I pick up on subtle factors that others may miss.  If you're angry, I'm angry, if you're sad, I'm sad.  I can pick that up in a heartbeat, and large crowds overwhelm me to the point of extreme exhaustion.  In my work as an esthetician/healer I can only work part-time or every other day because of the absorption of others' misery or elation.  This is not uncommon in some psychics (empaths), and it's certainly not uncommon among autistic people. But whereas the empaths might do mental exercises to form a protection barrier around them so that they can "ignore" all those emotions floating around, it's almost impossible for me to do that.  Mind over matter just sometimes can't be overcome when you're too sensitive.

I am friends on Facebook with quite a few psychics who are on the radio, do television appearances, are well known and constantly promote/market their talents.  My website just sits, waiting for someone to stumble across it so that I can hopefully do a reading for them.  Meanwhile my husband's exacerbated waiting for me to start bringing in a decent income and is full of suggestions as to how to start selling my herbal remedies, lotions, quilts and psychic gift (he often asks me, "you didn't give away another recipe, did you???  You need to start copyrighting or patenting these things, including your quilt designs!").  The thought of self-promotion horrifies me!  Those who know me are well aware that self-doubt is not in my vocabulary, but having to face multiple clients at one time is a thought I can't even imagine.  Do I believe that everyone should hire me as their psychic counselor or herbal guru?  Absolutely! After all, I'm fabulous!  But just the thought of having to promote myself is debilitating, and not in the way that most people think: it's not the fact that I can't do it (as in people who whine about not being able to move on or can't imagine the future - my advice to them is the same as I've done with myself: just do it and enjoy/learn from the journey!), it's the fact that if I self-promoted I'd have people looking at me (don't touch me! don't look at me! :D).  Is this because I'm in some way autistic or is it because I'm psychic and instantly start downloading another's life story, including deceased loved ones?

And speaking of Facebook, I've also noticed that some people who aren't professional psychics but who are sensitive in some way like to do what I consider "out psychic the psychic."  If I write about something paranormal or a feeling I've gotten or even a sychronicity, or if someone asks me a question about my thoughts on something out of the ordinary that occurred, the comments from those people will be either derision or the fact that they knew "that" ages ago or someone in their family felt "that" worse than I did.  And often their answers to someone's question will be way off, in my opinion - my trying to get a word in edge wise about why the answer may be erroneous is overridden by their insistence that there's only one viewpoint (theirs and not mine, because what do I know - how could I possibly know the real answer when they, who've been reading alt sites and believe those answers to be the one and only truth, are regurgitating those same lies as fact, know all the answers, and my gift is small in comparison according to them).  I just sigh and move on - too much over stimulation and bombardment.   I love feedback as in "I thought/felt/saw that too" or "I don't see it that way at all" (confirmation is always a wonderful thing, as is healthy opposition!) but guys!  This isn't a contest! We are all one - get it?  We are all connected to each other and to the universe at large so it stands to reason that we all should be able to see and feel what each other is seeing and feeling.  Well, we don't all connect, unfortunately, and is my ability to look inward a curse or a gift?  While some people would consider my stubbornness for getting some semblance of truth out there cockiness or elitism (thus trying to "out psychic the psychic"), I see it as a genuine compulsion for trying to get everyone to understand even briefly what I see in that otherworld/inner world; while some think my comments mean I think my opinion is the only one that matters, it's not so much that I think that way as it is that I've spent years and years looking inward/researching/using my universal connections to reach that opinion - and if you can't understand the difference in the two concepts, I really can't help you.  One of my favorite quotes is from the movie "Broadcast News" because it resonates deeply within me:  When told "It must be nice to always believe you know better, to always think you're the smartest person in the room", Holly Hunter's character whispers, "No, it's awful." And that's exactly how I so often feel.

My request to anyone reading this blog is to start thinking about "different" and how "different" is not a choice in any culture or any walk of life.  It. Just. Is.